yay hehe

you know..i haven't felt so fulfilling and happy for such a long time.
like me being just me, enjoying what I am doing, enjoying and appreciating people around me.
like I finally walked out of the darkness I got myself into.
finding the motivation and determination to wake up early and go to bed early.
trying to get 8hrs sleep or say keep my sleeping hrs to less than 12 hrs haha.
trying to change my lifestyle because it has been so unhealthy and depressing.
seems like it worked?
stop having supper, workout more.
no more period no more infection shit, no excuse not to work out.
and everyday so free?
trying to occupy my days with tasks.
spending the entire day to cook today.
going for appt.
the day past so quickly without me realising.
tho I was bored and looking at the time while I was cutting hair and after I showered.
but those were just short periods compared to the long period daily where I've got nothing to do.
having the plan to find a part time.
but still yet to look up on it.
career fair next week.
I feel much more busier than just sleeping in and waiting for time to past.
I feel good tbh.

and getting my bueller back, is like the best thing ever.
feel so loved and blessed, in fact feeling very normal about us and not needing to worry.
truly ecstatic and reassuring.
it makes me appreciate him so much and make me love him even more.
or say, to fall in love with him again when I thought the passion was long gone.
it's the kinda feeling like 你把你的狗养的那么好，别的主人都嫉妒 kinda feeling .
like they see you and they want to touch you and ask how you bring up your dog kinda thing?
I feel like I'm that dog where other women would ask me whao what made you sparkle and so blissful.
and I would say, him!
not just appreciate appreciate, but like idolize that person kinda appreciate?
like you truly respect and feel him more for what he has achieved and done.
feels like my heart haven't felt so alive for a long time.
isn't funny how someone's actions can influence you so much? and how just somebody can make you feel like that and also at the same time make you feel like shit like the worst heartbreak ever.
heaven and hell combination.
but I feel so reassured he understood, feel so reassured that he finally saw things as it was.
so thankful really.
that burden/stone has finally been unloaded.
thankew so much.
it meant alot to me, to have you back in the same wave length and frequency.
it means alot to have us finally back on track and holding hands walking together again.
so glad you came back. (:

and for once in super damn long.
it's finally a very positive post.
I feel almost like I've walked out of a depression period lol.
and to find peace and comfort among family members, despite mia (legit cos I didn't even say where I go but just disappear every single day hahahha) and I wasn't really questioned and no cold war.
all the sister time everytime we are all at home and not too busy, which is usually at night.
it is comforting to know that everyone is there and you are not scrutinised nor out casted because you weren't around for so long.
finally feeling good to be part of this fam.
despite all the bickers but well it happens.
as long as nothing major I guess.

I hope things remain like this.
my 2 most impt and strongest support.
I love you guys.
all of you.
♡♡♡